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What do you like?
To create your dream life, you have to know what you like. I’ve worked with and spoken with so many women who say, “I don’t even know what I like.” There are many reasons for this, but a big one is putting your family first. You’ve spent so much time trying to make everyone else happy, that you sacrificed what you wanted. There just wasn’t really time for yourself, because you were busy feeding kids, driving kids to practices, keeping up with school work, and volunteering for class parties. When you did have free time, you spent it with your spouse, or getting errands done.
Now that the kids are self-sufficient and living their own lives (with a little input from you now and then), you finally have some time to think about what you want the rest of your life to look like. Maybe, you’re one of the smart ones, and decided to create your dream life while you didn’t have kids yet, or your kids are still young, but either way, you have to explore what you like and don’t like.
What is your favorite color? What is your dream vacation destination? Do you like Italian food best, or Mexican food? What are your favorite attributes of your house? How do you want family and friends to treat you?
What is it that you don’t like?
I can’t tell you how many women answer the questions above with, “I don’t know.” Sometimes it is easier to begin with what you are sure you don’t like. For some reason it is easier to say, “Oh no, I hate spaghetti!” than to say, “I love to eat pasta with pesto.” One client told me that when her family asks her where she wants to go for dinner, she can’t even think of what she wants to eat. She said, “Nothing even comes to mind. I have no feelings one way or the other.” You can’t create a dream life like that!
However, you could probably easily tell me which restaurant your spouse likes, but you refuse to go to anymore. You know the paint color that you would never let come close to the walls in your house. It would be no problem for you to tell me what your boss does that totally annoys you.
Take a piece of paper and divide it into two halves. On one side of the paper, write “Things I Like”. On the other half of the paper, write “Things I Don’t Like”.
Start with the things you don’t like if it is easier, and list 30 things on each side. Here’s what will happen, the first 10 or so will be really easy. Then you may struggle a little. That’s okay. You can take a break, and write down things as they come to you. Put your list somewhere easy to find.
To create your dream life, you have to know what you like and want for the future. Is this a difficult exercise for you? If so, you may like my program called You Can Only Change Yourself, coming out December 1 or 2, 2021. It is a 4 week, self-led program to help you create a life that is full of joy and peace. No more drama from those around you and help with focusing on yourself for once. There is a supportive Facebook group, and it is very reasonably priced at $50. Get more information here.